Are you thinking what I'M THINKING???

In the Food and Beverage Industry, we have it tough tough TOUGH! From drunk bar guests, nepotism, staff sleeping with each other to manager's stealing. We deal with every "cream of the crop" in our society. So tell me, how was your shift??? Anything exciting happening we should all know about? I'm ready when you are!!! Tell Auntie Lisa!

Wines.... What have you had lately???/

As you all know, I absolutely love wine and can drink my body weight in it. I just recently drank through most of South Africa...

Loves:
Indaba Chenin Blanc- nice and light, refreshing for the summer, definite citrus
The Wolftrap Red Blend- party in your mouth, blend of 5 unusual grapes, goes great with anything
Swanson Estate Pinotage- fantastic to drink on its own... nice dark fruit, not too heavy, sip here, sip there... oh no, where did it go???

Disliked:
Nothing. lol

Servers With Primary Hyperhidrosis...ICK!

Due to being on weight watchers, I thought to myself today.... "let's walk up to the local Greek Restaurant and have some dolmathes (stuffed grape leaves). Instead of getting it to-go, I decided to treat myself and dine in with a table next to a window. When I was greeted by the server, I was horrified!!! The guy was sweating from head to toe as if he just ran from Greece to wait on me.

The server, Damasko, was very pleasant, but the sweat just dripped down his face and neck. He kept wiping himself with his sleeve and hand. I couldn't help but think "if one drop hits my table, me or my food, I am going to go Postal on Mr. Parthenon!"

After a few moments of pondering on whether this is really how I wanted to enjoy my lunch, I changed my mind and said I needed to go. I paid for my drink and then went to the host and ordered my food for take out. Fortunately, Damasko was so busy, he didn't even notice I was still in the restaurant waiting for my food. Thank God he wasn't going to touch my food! SHEW! (wiping my dry forehead from relief)

I came home immediately and looked this disorder up!! Did you know those that sweat profusely and uncontrollably regardless of the situation, have what is known as Primary or Secondary Hyperhidrosis? I swear that in every concept and every state there is always that ONE waiter that has this disorder. The unfortunate thing is... they always FIND MY TABLE!!!!

So the next time you see one of your fellow co-workers sweating while sitting down in an air conditioned room, recommend they check out Hyperhidrosis! It can be socially devastating to have sweat as your natural force field against others!!!

By the way, the dolmathes were great... not too salty! LOL

Consolidating Your Steps

We have all come to work, had our shift meeting, straightened up our sections and prepared for the evening's business. Then found after all the preparation, a long period of time goes by and nothing happens... no tables come in, a few people are sitting at the bar and we are all in the back standing around. The wait, though not profitable, allows us time to catch up the day's events and entertain ideas of what to do after work. Then BAM... the 7pm rush. We have been waiting so long that we are lethargic, unprepared and in the middle of a great story!

Uh oh... the host staff just triple sat me and a few other servers. We are now running around like chickens with our heads cut off because we know that we are two steps away from taking the restaurant down like the Titanic! What to do?

As a long time server and manager, I've found that by consolidating your steps and treating all of your tables as one will help out tremendously.

GREETING/DRINKS

When your tables are all sat at once, they will be expecting the same thing: Greeting, drink order, bread and then their drinks themselves. So how do you do this with 3 tables all at once?

1) ring in all of your bar drinks first
2) prepare all of your non-alcoholic beverages on a tray
3) put all the bread and butters on the tray (last)
4) go to the bar and get the alcohol (It takes awhile depending on if the bar is busy with happy hour or behind on juicing and cutting fruit)
5) If your tray is too full, ask someone to follow you. Your section is usually in one specific area. Thus, allowing that person to set down the other tray (preferably the bread and butter) so you don't run back and forth between trays and looking at your captain's pad like Rainman.
6) Deliver drinks and bread to each table and tell them you will be back momentarily to go over the menu.
7) Then once you've completed doing your rounds to all your tables with beverages and bread, go back to the 1st table sat.
8) Give your spiel, answer questions. If ready, take the entire order to cut down on running back and forth.
9) Go to the 2nd table ... REPEAT.
10) The 3rd, the same.

***Sometimes you get lucky and everyone is ready. In reality, not usually. So if you see a table is going to be time consuming- 6 old ladies that will rundown their medical history, etc., ring in your orders as you get them.***

I do strongly recommend doing this unless you are not very quick on the micros, aloha, POS. If you feel you are getting behind the 8 ball and you don't write like a doctor on your captain's pad, then see if someone will help you by ringing it in. Ask a manager... we don't mind usually. Not to mention, we are much more accurate and faster on the system.

After all tables have been watered, breaded, spieled and possibly had their orders taken, move the entire section to the next phase.....

PREPARATION

1)any special requests (extra butter, more lemons, training wheels for an alcoholic beverage, whatever) get first.
2) Simultaneously, if you have tables that ordered appetizers, add plates and any extra silverware need (spoon if soup, hot towels,etc.) on the tray.
3) drop them all off and check drink levels
4) Refill drinks as necessary
5)Check on any soups, salads, appetizers that should be coming out within minutes

DELIVERY

Now that you've delivered your 1st courses, start preparing for the next step....clearing and next course.

1) Do your 2 bite,2 minute checkback first. Make sure everyone is good.

2) Always have a tray with you so that you can clear as you go. Some people scoff the 1st course down.

3) CRUMB, CRUMB, CRUMB... using your crumber and a side plate... not your hand, not brushing it on the floor like at home... not a tray... a small side plate to gather the crumbs!!!

4) Have a marking plate available to reset their silverware for next course. Do this immediately. Sometimes the kitchen knocks entrees out and you are unprepared. It pisses off the runner, iritates the guest and makes you look like you don't know what you're doing.

5) When finished going to all tables, sweep your section one last time for any stray plates, more refills, more bread. You know in the South, bread is a vegetable... so keep it filled people!

ENTREES

1) Entrees now come out.

2) 2 minute/2 bite check back again. If someone is iffy and responds "uh.. it's okay," FIX IT RIGHT THERE, if you don't... you will eventually with a manager or recook or whatever.

3) Refill drinks again, now leave them alone.

POS System

1) Now is the time to bring all checks up to date... non-alcoholic beverages rung in (don't forget bottled water people!!!!)

2) Any items needing to be voided or comp'd

3) I'd even suggest that if you think your tables might be getting coffee... get some cups warmed up... make sure there are creamers filled, sugar caddies on the table, enough saucers.

(This is the moment you see if your teammates have done their sidework... if they haven't... you better get on it!!!)

4) Clear entree plates when EVERYONE is finished or if they have pushed the item aside.

5) I recommend offering coffee TO ALL AT THE TABLE when the first plate is cleared.

6) If you have timed things right, all three tables should be remotely close to the same cycle and will be needing coffee also.

Well, I hope this helps. As easy as this all sounds, I cannot tell you how many times I find servers weeded from running back and forth and not stopping, breathing, thinking and consolidating.

Shift Drama

Every day in the restaurant is filled with new and exciting news. The drama from the previous shift, what happened on bug night, who did what with whom the night before, the list is endless. So tell me, what happened on your shift today?

Wine Myths

There are so many self-proclaimed Sommeliers out there nowadays, I could just scream. They have ideas of what they "think" is right, when in fact... is by industry standards... very very wrong. So I thought I would take a moment to dispell some myths for all of you in the industry. It will assist in your wine presentation as well as give you a conversational piece while opening the wine bottle.

1) Smelling the cork: is NOT an indicator of how good the wine is. The person is merely smelling mold. The cork can be observed to see how the wine was stored and if it was faulty, causing the wine to possibly turn bad.
2) Putting a magnet under bad wine will turn it into good wine. This has been marketed by many inventors, yet has not been scientifically proven. Currently, there is a $1 million pay out to anyone who can prove that this is true. Needless to say, no inventors have come forward as of yet.
3) The Punt: The punt is the indentation in the bottom of the wine bottle. It is not there for you to stick your thumb in and be all fancy in trying to pour the bottle of wine at the table. It originally came about when Dom Perignon discovered his wines had 2nd fermentation occuring. The bottles kept exploding. Thus, which led to a glassmaker having to figure out a design that could withstand the intense pressure without breaking the bottle. Hence... the punt was invented.
4) Decanting White Wine: Is it acceptable? Uh, only if you're an idiot. White wine does not rest on the lees which doesn't throw any sediment. Crystal tartrates may occur in white wine, but is harmless... a little crunchy, but really harmless. Decanting is used for reds mostly.
5) Screw Caps Are Bad: Wrong-o kiddos! Screw caps are actually very very good. Robert Mondavi was the first to push for such an idea. Every year over $10 million wines are reported for being corked, tainted or bad. Stelvin enclosures (aka screw caps) preserve a wine, eliminates almost all chances of the wine to become oxidized, are easier to store and you don't need a waiter's tool to open it.
6) Do you present a screw cap to a guest? Absolutely not!!!! They are aware it screws offf as they see you elbowing it like a pickle jar... put it in your pocket and complete the service according to standards. However, hang onto the cork, because sometimes they are interested in having it back if they don't finish the bottle. It's a bitch to know that screw cap you threw away 20 minutes ago is now under that table of 10's plate scrapings. Don't you dare think about retrieving it. I know it will cross your mind, but fight the urge!!!
7) Ladies always first: Yes and no! If the person that ordered the wine is a lady... she is served last. Too bad, so sad, that is the standard.
8) Can't have wine...too many sulfites! If I hear that one more time, I might just punch someone in the face! Did you know that a can of tuna has more sulfites than wine? Headaches when drinking wine can occur for many different reasons: allergic reaction, the natural hystamines in the wine, drank too much, not enough water... sulfites are usually one of the last things to cause a person a reaction. There are some wines out there that do not sulfur their products, ask your bar manager when ordering if you see there is a need.
9) Once a wine is opened, it is done for... drink or throw out! Wrong again.... wines can last, depending on the maker, varietal, and seal up to a week. Just make sure you put it in your refrigerator (both red and white). If, when you get to it, it is bad.... use it for cooking or give to someone you hate. It's that simple.
10) Just by opening a bottle helps the wine breath: Nope.... the only way to allow the wine to breath is through decanting or pouring into a glass and having the person swirl it. Breathing allows the wine to come up to room temperature, release the aromatics of the wine showing off its complexity and will soften it a bit. When people say "the wine is tight" they usually mean it needs some air. That's all.

A Day In The Life Of Restaurant Staff!!!

Waiting tables is a “go-to” profession done by millions of Americans every year. Some do it for the fast cash, graduate college then go onto their intended career. Others, to help ends meet because the selected career doesn’t provide the lifestyle they would care for; however, there are a select few that choose it as their lifelong profession. Those of us “lifers” thrive on the constant interpersonal communication, the electricity that race through the late night air and the unpredictableness that an evening’s shift can bring.

Many of us are over-educated with one or more degrees looking for something outside the 5-9 rigmarole. We abhor suits, would like as little responsibility as possible and enjoy having a social life of quality. You may classify us as Generation X, Y or Z, who knows, but we are what we are and the restaurant industry is programmed into our DNA.

We have remained quiet, courteous and accommodating long enough. Today is your lucky day to hear what we think on the other side of the table. We have observed your traits and characteristics and labeled them accordingly. Restaurant staffs, through trial and error, have learned the art of profiling for their own survival. Behind our crisply ironed uniforms and plastered on smiles, we stand at the edge of your table attempting to read you like a poker professional! We evaluate your attire, observe your demeanor, listen to you talk, wait for an acknowledgement of our presence. Within two minutes, we have a good understanding how this show will play out. Sometimes we are surprised, but for the most part…not usually.

Companies provide questionnaires, website comment pages and manager table visits to solicit guest opinions and information. Yet, restaurant staffs are invisible, rarely questioned by management and never thought about by corporations. We are the soldiers on the front lines directed by out-of-touch CEOs and company policies.

Therefore, I have created a guide on what we have learned one table at a time including a standard profiling system known throughout the industry. Buckle up your seat belts people I’m going to take you for a bumpy ride. Perhaps I’m calling a spade a spade here, but no more pussyfooting around. We are tired of being ignored and, if we’re lucky, devalued.

We have all been on your side of the table. We understand the intricate parts of the dining room, practically live, eat and sleep at the restaurant and most of us can tell you verbatim what is on that menu. So will someone… anyone… please explain to us why ya’ll continuously try to surprise us with unbelievable things from questions, to behaviors, to bringing your own stuff to the restaurant, children, special requests, sense of entitlement and most of all just enough money for the bill that you want to split 20 ways?

As the great late George Carlin used to say about his comedy, “figure out where the line of obscurity is, cross it and bring the people with you.” So join me on an adventure of storytelling and profiling that will leave you speechless, literally. It is time for ya’ll to experience a day in the life of a server!

I'll go first:


I was managing at a fine dining concept on a Thursday night. We were especially busy due to various pharamaceutical groups having meetings. A gentleman was walking out through our front doors and stopped. He turned to us at the host stand with complete and utter anger on his face. He asked if I was a manager. I pondered on whether to respond "speak no english," but smiled and said "yes, how may I help you sir?" The man, holding a to-go container, cocked back his arm as if he was getting ready to make a life or death throw. Angry that his event took too long, he had difficulty finding parking and now had to leave with his FREE meal because of a scheduling conflict decided it was time to take it out on someone. That someone.... was me.

As the plastic box spun through the air, the perfectly cooked Medium Rare Filet separated from the container like the space shuttle entering into the Earth's atmosphere. The doctor obviously played baseball in college because he hit his intended target, my white blouse, dead on. The smack of filet to my chest was piercing like a fog horn at a football game. The blood dripped from my face and chest as he stormed out. Little did I know when I woke up that morning, my night would end like a scene out of the movie "Carrie."